Thursday, September 29, 2016

Tears in a Dream

Him: Hi!
Her:Hey,what's up?
Him: I have something to say.
Him: I love you
Him: Because...
Her: That's not good enough
Him: But I'm saying it with all sincerity
Her: If you are, then let me you ask a question
Him: What?
Her: Do you love because you see a confidant, or do you love me because you need love in your life?
Him: I love you because you made me feel that despite my imperfections I can still be a good man.
Her: What if I don't feel the same?
Him; It would hurt, and I would definitely have a broken heat, but it's the price of true love
Her; I'm glad you feel that way.
Her: Because  I also love you.....................................
Her; As strongly as a sister loves her brother.
Him: I totally understand. I'm happy we had this chat.
Her: I appreciate it also
Him: Wait..
Her: Yes?
Him; Would this all be over?the friendship?
Her; No,it won't.  Continue loving yourself, and you can always bet I'm here beside you.
Him: Will you still love me?or by any chance be in love with me?
Her: Know this and take it by heart.  I will always be here for you, no matter what.  I will be your ears, you shoulder, and I would most definitely be your cane.
Him: So you will forever be with me?
Her; If you want me to be here.
Him: I do
Her: Then it's settled.  I will be your shadow
Him: Will you hold the broken pieces of my heart?
Her: I will.  
Him; Will you put it back together?
Her: I will help you heal, but not in the way you want me to
Him; Will you be mine.
Her: I will always be yours
Him: The pieces are starting to mend
Her: It would crack with the dawn..
Him: Yes, I know.
Her: Be strong each time it mends and cracks for it will always be a cycle
Him; Why?
Her; For each time you wake up, you would realize that the only time I'm loving you is through this dream.

Him: I know, my angel.  Goodbye.

Dreams are our escape, but some dreams were meant to make you realize that the situation you are in are just that...DREAMS...

Thursday, September 15, 2016


I'll speak the words you're unwilling to accept
Through your actions, you silently cried to me to be your voice
Thank you for speaking waves in your silence
for now,dear John, you're words have been spoken..

I love you for you are different
I love you for being new
I love you for reasons I cannot fathom
I love beyond what I understand
I love you for the hurt
I love you for the rejection
but most of all..
I love you for the reality of what is meant to be

I see you from afar, and I see how you smile.
I see you with a frown, and secretly wish I could make it disappear even for a while
I see you in pain, and I want to run to your side
I see your tears, and I painfully look away overpowered with pride

I want to hold you, but I fear that you would let go
I want to touch you, but you shied away
I want face you, but you slowly turned your back
I tried to man up, but I lack that push
I see myself raw, but you just stood there blindly

You gave me your time, and I gave you the truth
You gave a once-over, that opportunity I took
You had no emotion when we met, I felt myself falter
You shook your head, and I know you asked if I was sincere

I try to be brave, but I lack the courage
You saw through the cracks, and I was left bare
I know you have your doubts, but please hear me out
I have a broken past, but I try to renew it now

You walked away, without giving me a second glance
I knew I screwed up, despite being given a chance
I am far beyond perfect, and I know I am broken
I have to face the fact that this words will be left unspoken

I know you're cynical, I can't blame you
I played with hearts until I met you
This time I swear, my intentions are true
But the disbelief in your eyes left me blue

I will always be silently wishing for my missed opportunities
But I blame myself for not showing my sincerity
When I talk to you through words I am unfazed
But I never had the character to show it to your face

I wish I was strong enough to show I care
But knowing how you feel, I certainly wouldn't dare
I am pretend to be heartless and really tough
But you stood up to me and called my bluff

You were the first to ignore the advances I did
I saw my heart, and it was the first time I saw it bleed
This is the payback I get for breaking them and making them wish they could die
A first for me, for this is the only time I allowed myself to cry

You said goodbye through cryptic words
I said please hold on, but you left my pleas unheard
I have wronged a lot, and this time I feel the pain
A lesson so tough, but now I know trust has to be gained

You walk away without looking back
I regret crushing feelings before, for now I fit on the very same rack
I guess from the start, success has never been with me
and I guess it still won't be
You are gone and I know I can never make you stay
It was a privilege loving you anyway

Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Dear John

Dear John,

 I know it hurts.. I can see the emotions bottled up.  I sympathize.
I feel for you.  My eyes tear up seeing you this way.  My heart cracks seeing you feel the pain you try so hard to avoid.  I know how you feel.  I have been there.


You have to realize the harrowing reality that love was never made to make you happy.  It was never meant to exist as the easiest thing on earth.  Love will always be painful, it will always hurt.  It was made not to be enjoyed the moment you feel it, but was created to make you feel the thorns around each rose you pursue, and when you feel and survive the pain, there you begin to appreciate the essence of what the word LOVE really means.

Yes,I know it's not the most romantic thing you have ever heard.  It was never meant be associated with romance in the first place.  It was always designed for you to appreciate every good thing that comes your way after all the trials and tribulations.

You ask me why I look at it as something distressing.  Here is my answer:

Love has always been a product.  It has never been the cause of things.  No matter where you go, or whoever you meet.  No one will offer you Love at hand for that matter.  It will always be an end result.  
Like the love of a mother to her newborn after hours of excruciating labor
Like the love of a couple after going through the mishaps and throes of courting
Like the love of the people for their country after seeing it destroyed by foreign lands

It will never stand alone, It will always be a mix of all that exists, that's why when everything ends, LOVE is all that remains.  It will always exist beyond the thrashing and gnashing of bitterness and despair, you know why? because despite being borne out of difficulty and hurt, Love will always be iron-forged;it will always be perfect.  It will reflect everything you sacrificed just to achieve something good and something immaculate.  As a saint once said, "love dies without sacrifice"

Now that I have answered your question.  I will say this to you:

I see your pain..I see your doubts, and I even see the struggle hidden within your hard eyes.  I see the tears and the guilt behind those dimpled smiles.  I can see more of what you hide that you could ever imagine.  I see you as a scared little boy hungry for love amidst all the attention you have been given.  I know it hurts not being able to grab the most coveted feeling in the world.  You know it, You had a taste of it, but you have never fully owned it.
It hurts to see a battered soul suffer and not be able to achieve what he greatly deserves, but you will,one day, understand that everything you want in life, you will eventually get, but not at the timing you want and definitely not in the form you expect.  

Please let go and walk away for you will someday realize that all this suffering..all this rejection will spawn into a beautiful friendship that could hopefully bloom into a beautiful appreciation for one another.  May you be able to learn to embrace all the pain and the tears. As you begin to earn love little by little, through the torment you've been through, please use it on yourself and learn to appreciate the person you are starting to become.  Be a great person, and be a great man.  Use the love you have harvested from all the pain to make yourself better, for someday you will be able to earn enough love to build a beautiful relationship with the right person.

I will always be here to guide you through rough patches.  It may not be by your side, but I hope that my mere presence will help you realize that it's enough to push on and embrace the pain.  bear in mind as we part the message that I will leave:

Love is infinite..You can always make more if you want to..

Take on all the adversities and emerge iron-clad for I will be here by the sidelines cheering and proud..

Thank you 

I'm Sorry

Good bye..

"Love never says I have done enough"