I know it hurts.. I can see the emotions bottled up. I sympathize.
I feel for you. My eyes tear up seeing you this way. My heart cracks seeing you feel the pain you try so hard to avoid. I know how you feel. I have been there.
You have to realize the harrowing reality that love was never made to make you happy. It was never meant to exist as the easiest thing on earth. Love will always be painful, it will always hurt. It was made not to be enjoyed the moment you feel it, but was created to make you feel the thorns around each rose you pursue, and when you feel and survive the pain, there you begin to appreciate the essence of what the word LOVE really means.
Yes,I know it's not the most romantic thing you have ever heard. It was never meant be associated with romance in the first place. It was always designed for you to appreciate every good thing that comes your way after all the trials and tribulations.
You ask me why I look at it as something distressing. Here is my answer:
Love has always been a product. It has never been the cause of things. No matter where you go, or whoever you meet. No one will offer you Love at hand for that matter. It will always be an end result.
Like the love of a mother to her newborn after hours of excruciating labor
Like the love of a couple after going through the mishaps and throes of courting
Like the love of the people for their country after seeing it destroyed by foreign lands
It will never stand alone, It will always be a mix of all that exists, that's why when everything ends, LOVE is all that remains. It will always exist beyond the thrashing and gnashing of bitterness and despair, you know why? because despite being borne out of difficulty and hurt, Love will always be iron-forged;it will always be perfect. It will reflect everything you sacrificed just to achieve something good and something immaculate. As a saint once said, "love dies without sacrifice"
Now that I have answered your question. I will say this to you:
I see your pain..I see your doubts, and I even see the struggle hidden within your hard eyes. I see the tears and the guilt behind those dimpled smiles. I can see more of what you hide that you could ever imagine. I see you as a scared little boy hungry for love amidst all the attention you have been given. I know it hurts not being able to grab the most coveted feeling in the world. You know it, You had a taste of it, but you have never fully owned it.
It hurts to see a battered soul suffer and not be able to achieve what he greatly deserves, but you will,one day, understand that everything you want in life, you will eventually get, but not at the timing you want and definitely not in the form you expect.
Please let go and walk away for you will someday realize that all this suffering..all this rejection will spawn into a beautiful friendship that could hopefully bloom into a beautiful appreciation for one another. May you be able to learn to embrace all the pain and the tears. As you begin to earn love little by little, through the torment you've been through, please use it on yourself and learn to appreciate the person you are starting to become. Be a great person, and be a great man. Use the love you have harvested from all the pain to make yourself better, for someday you will be able to earn enough love to build a beautiful relationship with the right person.
I will always be here to guide you through rough patches. It may not be by your side, but I hope that my mere presence will help you realize that it's enough to push on and embrace the pain. bear in mind as we part the message that I will leave:
Love is infinite..You can always make more if you want to..
Take on all the adversities and emerge iron-clad for I will be here by the sidelines cheering and proud..
|"Love never says I have done enough"|